Of goodbyes and partings;

*Last post*

To fall asleep was the worst-made, yet probably the best decision I ever made.

I’m barely sober now as I type this post.

But I guessed I was kind of revitalized by the 50-min crash that ensued a failed attempt at reading John Rawls (who, unfortunately, is residing on my internet browser instead of a nice, comfortable book).

As you would have guessed, I think this should be the last post in this blog; not the right time: too early to make conclusions and look back as a whole, too late to project anymore into the pragmatic future.

But still, it still will be appropriate to do some basic reflection and perhaps some (very resigned) contemplation of my future prospects.

This year, I’ve actually grown a lot (that’s what I think for most of the time anyway); I think the main change came when I decided to minorly reform my hairstyle – from sweeping my fringe to the side to leaving it at the front (don’t laugh). Somehow, I’ve become so much more self-aware I could almost term it vanity.

The content within my blogpost also differs immensely from what I wrote last year. I can now laugh at what I wrote last year; but I deleted them so that I could not humiliate myself.



I think I can say that (I’m not lying) I’ve worked at least 3 times harder than I did last year. And ten times harder than I did in primary school. I know what I want now; I worked hard for it.

But it seems I’m still not walking out of math tests with the prized confident feeling that still existed in term 1, where I got a 38/40 (which, to me, is very high).

And I actually don’t really know what to do.

These are the effects of trying to write something while being half asleep.

Let me just post 3 things I’ve written before.

By the way, looking through the literary pieces I’ve written for these blog, I’ve been in awe over the quality of them, both in a good and bad way.

***

The lethality of drugs
Is what draws the instinct of danger:
To inject for the sake of euphoria;
To consume for the sake of excitement;
The drug is like passion; narcotics
Of frenzied, crazed desire;

Of the pain, the unrequited desire and
Unrequited sacrifice;
Give for what you take of love,
Take from what you gave of sacrifice.


***

Cry;
Cry for the waves in the sea that longs for the land;
Weep for the currents that want back in the lake
The drippings in the stream that are to go out in the wild.

Cry for the aging mountains; unwillingly
Living an eternal life
Subject to the snow of summer, wind of
Winter; tears adorn its cliffs.

Cry for the fallen brown leaf;
Its crisp countenance trampled upon by
Callous passers-by
Once-upon-a-time emerald glow
Forcibly squeezed out as oozes of
Lifeless emotion;

Cry, weep for the world
Awoken in celebration in times of
Catastrophe; an indifferent apathy
That hardens their hearts.

Cry these heartless tears for me.

***

Salt sifting from the sea,
Freshwater lake a result;
Blandness of the times over the years;

Eroding the coast of memories, molding
The beach line beyond
Recognition
The sands of old,
The waves of new turbulence.

Post modernism?